By MINA AMSO
Christchurch Bishop Michael Gielen has met with dozens of women from throughout the diocese, at an event aiming at connecting, inspiring and also sharing some laughs and banter.
Women often times feel as if they’re alone, isolated, or that they are the only ones feeling challenged, said Jacinta Stopforth, organiser of the event, which took place at the Lamb of God Centre in Mairehau on February 9.
“When you go to something and you go home thinking ‘I am not the only one in the diocese of faith. I’ve got other sisters around me. I’ve got other people who are passionate’, it is re-energising to actually move forward again.”
She said that women must remember to “know who you are, and whose you are”.
The night began with a bit of ice breakers, trivia, small group banter, then three women sharing their testimonies. The talked about their struggles, challenges and faith journeys, mixing it up with some laughs and humour.
Catherine Shaw shared her story of how she lost her first husband and two friends in a car accident two years after her marriage.
“My whole life had changed.”
She was constantly reminded of scripture to keep her strong and focused on God, like Proverbs 3:5,6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight”.
Or Isaiah 55:8-9: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways”.
And 1 Corinthians 2:9: “For as it is written, Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has the human heart imagined what God has prepared for those who love him.”
Ms Shaw found love again and got remarried, and she was “blessed” with four children. But her second marriage ended with her husband, Paul, being diagnosed with cancer. Shaw found herself a widow again a few years later.
“Once again you’re faced with these huge questions like, why have you done this to me God? But you just have to have faith that ‘My ways are not your ways. My thoughts are not your thoughts’.
“You’ve got to trust in the Lord, no matter where you are and what’s happening. I’ve had some tragedy in my life, but had so many blessings.”
She focused on the blessings, and on the fact that God had a good plan for her life. She said that she trusted, even though it was difficult.
“You’re on the journey, you just have to take each day at a time, and trust that the Lord is with you. Have faith, like there are so many times where I felt like giving up, but I just had to have that faith and say ‘I am going to go to Mass, or I am going to do that prayer hour, or I am going to get up and just pray a simple prayer and have the faith’.”
Good things happened for Ms Shaw, and she waved her engagement ring to the crowd with a smile.
“Just a proposal on top of the Eiffel Tower six months ago, so you know God is good, and he has a plan for our life.”
Christchurch North parishioner Samantha Lee-Bryce was glad that she came to hear this testimony and others, thanks to a friend who invited her to the event.
“It’s been a good opportunity to connect with friends that I haven’t seen in a while, and meet new people, to be inspired by other women that’ve been through a whole Iot more than I have, and to learn from that and to be reminded of how important faith is,” she said.
The ladies also heard from Bishop Gielen, who touched on how the women in his life challenged him and helped him become the man he is today. He spoke of his early childhood years, being raised on a farm. He talked about how, as a young boy, he enjoyed the company of his brother and father more. But soon enough his mother was having girls.
“Those girls brought so much joy in my life. Some of my ‘bestest’ memories of my life are my little sisters.
“They have made me into the man I am. Grown me into the man I am. I love my brother and I love my father, but my sisters made me become who they knew God was calling me to be. They’ve challenged me and forced me and battled with me for me to become that man. So I want to honour them.
“I want to honour you as mothers, I want to honour you as wives, I want to honour you as sisters. You don’t know the joy you brought your husbands and your brothers and your fathers.”
But there was one more important woman in Bishop Gielen’s life – Mary, Jesus’ mother.
“If you go to my house, it’s covered in Marian images, because I love all her different faces.
“You don’t choose Mary, she chooses you. She chose me at a young age. I’ve always felt her profound presence and courage. Today, not by chance but by providence, we officially opened Marian school. I reflected on that young relatively unknown [woman], most [likely] poorly educated, definitely not set aside for any great role of leadership, and yet she’s shown some of the greatest courage that the world has ever seen.
“Because she answered God’s call [in] her life.”
Bishop Gielen challenged all women to a deeper relationship with Mary, and to devote themselves to her.
“She’s the reason, she’s the one who’s given me the strength and the courage to keep saying ‘yes’, whatever the Lord wants in my life.
“I know our world is going into a deeper and deeper crisis of loneliness. I know it. I know we’re becoming more isolated, we’re individualistic, and you’ve heard me say it before, I believe it’s only getting worse. I know it because I sense it in myself, and I see it in others.
He reminded women to make an effort to form little communities.
“You have to help me fight against that [individualism]. We have to find ways of doing this [women’s events] because in the past we did it so naturally. We had to, we couldn’t do it alone. Somehow now we have found ways of doing it alone. So I honour you for coming tonight.”
Women from far and wide attended, including Carly Mulqueen from St Peter Chanel Parish in Waimakariri [Rangiora, some 25km north of Christchurch]. She said that the testimonies touched her heart.
“I loved how three women, at completely different ages and stages, but I loved how they incorporated loss and tragedy, but God’s goodness, He was there and carried the women through their hard times.”
Ms Mulqueen was diagnosed with breast cancer a year ago. She’s been under chemotherapy treatment, and says it was uplifting to be there, and fitting to hear the testimony of a woman whose brother is experiencing cancer treatment right now.
“I feel that now too. I love being able to talk to her about that afterwards too; you can make connective reconnections with people.”
Lourdes Mones-Cazan, from the Hurunui Parish [North Canterbury] drove some 50 minutes to get to the event, because she wanted to meet other women who are journeying in their faith as she is.
“To be encouraged by them and see what the bishop challenges us to do next. To love our Lady with all our hearts as a real mother that she is to us.”
Diocesan special projects assistant and event co-organiser Grace Challies said that the event was fully booked in a span of four weeks.
“There has been so much interest, we only started advertising on the 20th of December, and were at full capacity a month later (19th January). The event was asked for [by] women within the diocese, in response to the Men’s Breakfast event in May of 2023.”
The event was planned by a team of eight women who came from the central parishes in Christchurch city.
“Ultimately, we wanted women to have the opportunity to connect and be inspired. We also found that many of the parishes were striving to bring together women in their parish. And we thought that, by having this style of event, we might be able to attract more women who might not go to a parish level event, but also encourage those who come to keep connecting, and get involved with this style of event at their parish level,” Ms Challies said.
She added that they hope to run another, bigger event for women, later in the year.
Woman is closer to the soul, what everybody is supposed to be saving.